Magnus's Immortality
by alecsmanwhore
Summary: The fact that Alec can't live forever needs to be discussed. I can't write summaries :(


**Hey, I wrote this last night. To be honest, I don't even remember writing it, I was so tired. That probably explains why it's so depressing because depression isn't my style. Anyway, please enjoy and please review! ;) :P**

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Magnus was sat on the sofa in his apartment, watching 'What Not To Wear'. Chairman Meow was dozing on his lap, perfectly content. Magnus wasn't really paying attention to the TV though. A mucc more pressing matter was on his mind. Recently, he had found himself worrying about Alec a lot more than usual. Everytime Alec got a call, Magnus would feel physically sick, hoping it wasn't Jace or Isabelle calling him because they needed help fighting demons. Everytime Alec went to help them, he would just sit there waiting for him to return.

That's what he was doing tonight. Waiting for Alec to come home, wanting him to be safe. After all, Alec had little time on this Earth, before Death finally took him. And he wanted to spend every waking moment with Alec, for the rest of his life, however long that may be.

Maybe that was why he nearly always fell for mortals. Their frailty was what made them beautiful. They had to be treated with care and love, because their life force was like a candle, slowly burning down. And so easily snuffed out.

Before he'd met Alec, Magnus didn't think he could be loved as muh as Alec loved him. He was over 800 years old, and he had never been loved so much. In all 800 years of his existence, he had never loved someone as much as he loved Alec. He didn't think it possible to love someone that much. When he was gone, there would be no-one else, Magnus felt sure of it.

Another thing that had surprised him was the fact that Alec genuinely loved him. He didn't think that anyone could love him. His own mother had killed herself because she couldn't stand the sight of him, couldn't bear to look at the hideous thing she's created. Camille had deaired him, nothing more.

But Alec. He had made all the feelings of self hatred disappear. If someone like Alec could love him, then maybe he should love himself, and push all feelings of all self hatred away.

A small click interrupted Magnus's thoughts. The click of a door opening. Alec crept in quietly, obviously thinking Alec was asleep.

"How can I sleep?" asked Magnus, startling Alec.

"What do you mean, how can you sleep?" Alec closed the door and walked over to the sofa, sitting down next to Magnus. The sudden movement had startled Chairman Meow, as he stalked off for the safety of the the kitchen.

"I mean," Magnus put his head on Alec's shoulder as Alec rested his head on top of said Warlock's. "How can I sleep when I don't know what's happening to you? I can never sleep when you go off demon hunting because I don't know if you'll come back safe, or even at all. How can I sleep when you could be out there dying, and there's nothing I can do to save you? The rhought of losing you, it's..." By this point, tears were flowing freely down the warlock's face, leaving shining trails down both his cheeks.

"Oh, Magnus." the Shadowhunter sighed, pulling him closer, holding him tightly as tears shook Magnus's body uncontrollably. "Shhh, it's okay, it's alright. You think I don't worry about it too? I realise that I have a dangerous job, and I wake up each morning, knowing that this day could be my last. I could take my final breath and you might not be there. I want my last moments to be with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, because I love you." And with that, Alec kissed him briefly, but softly. As they pulled apart, Magnus whispered, "I love you too."

"But do you know what hurts the most?" Alec asked. "Knowing that when I die, you'll mourn me for a few months, but you'll move on. And you'll forget about me. I'll slowly sink into the back of your mind, along with Will, Camille and Woolsey. The thought of that kills me." Now Alec was crying too. It hurt Magnus so much to see him in this state.

"There will never be another after you. There never could be."

Alec smiled at him, blinking through tear filled eyes. "I would love to believe that, I honestly would. But I don't want you to be miserable, mourning me for the rest of your life. I'd hate for that to happen. And as much as it kills me to say this, when I die, please find someone else. You need someone to love you."

Magnus sighed. "You stupid Nephilim. You know I would do anything to keep you happy. But that's the one thing I can never do. I could never love someone half as much as I love you. Besides, it would be unfair on them because I'd never love them. Not really."

Alec moved him head onto Magnus's lap, where Magnus stroked his hair gently. Alec's eyelids began to droop. "Maybe you could learn to love them." he mumble incoherently.

"However much you'd like to believe that, it'll never happen." Magnus put hos head back and closed his eyes, just as Alec had done moments before. "Aku cinta kamu."

"What does it mean?" Alec whispered, sleep beginning to set in.

Magnus kissed the top of his head. "It means I love you." Sleep finally took over, protecting them both until the sun rose, until a new day with new dangers begun.

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**Apologies for not updating 'The Child' for a while, I'm trying to think of somewhere to go with it. I also apologise for this, it's not my usual stuff, but I hope you like it. Please review! ;)**


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